End-of-Life Planning
Have you had that conversation with your children?
You know the one. About getting your affairs in order? Your end-of-life plans?
One of the most difficult parts of my end-of-life planning was talking to my oldest son about my future wishes. He’s now in his 30s and has children of his own. It should have been straightforward, right? Well, it wasn’t.
Since we live far apart, we only manage to meet in person every few months or so. I was only in town for a few days and I didn’t want to spoil the fun of being together. The focus was on the grandchildren, not death.
Finally, with only a few hours before I was due to leave, I thought I’d found an opportunity to talk. I confess I was nervous, more than I thought I’d be at initiating the discussion. In my nervousness, I jumped right in and began with the words, “When I die”. As soon as they came tumbling out of my mouth I realized something was wrong. I saw the look of misinterpretation on my son’s face followed by “Are you dying, Dad?”
“No, no, no,” I stuttered, trying to reassure him but his tears told otherwise. It doesn’t matter how old our children are — they don’t like to think about their parents dying. In retrospect, I should have been more sensitive — I’d overlooked the fact that in the last 5 years, he’d grieved the loss of a dear…
